I'm one of "those" people. My dog is my child. She's fat because we give her vanilla ice cream. She's our big, furry 80 lb. baby. She isn't too aware of personal space. And I'm thankful for her. Even though she can't talk back to me (I wish she could; I confess sometimes I pretend she answers me; it's a sickness), she's fantastic company. When I was off work a couple of years ago for medical reasons, she was such a comfort to me... always cuddling up and giving me big, wet, sloppy kisses. Slobber that only a "mother" could love. Everyone else is just basically repulsed.
 |
| Night-time routine |
You might think it's dumb to be thankful for a pet... but that's probably just because you're a really, really mean person and you have a heart that's two sizes too small. Dogs are fun. Cats are okay, in kitten form. Reptiles and rodents in all shapes, forms, and sizes are nothing to be thankful for AT ALL.
But, lucky me, since I have a Boxer, I get to be thankful for her. And you get to hear all about her. Lucky you.
 |
| How can you not love this face? Seriously. |
Story time: please get out your cots, blankets, pillows, and a glass of juice.
 |
| Up close and personal. |
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away; the land of the Buckeyes, on a magical and glorious day, my fairy godmother (or my real mom) and I took a magic carpet ride (in a teal Ford Explorer Sport) to the tiny village of Coshocton. It was there, on that day, that we bartered with a fair maiden (actually, she was more "trailer park" than fair maiden) for a small, precious ball of fur. She was also a ball of puke, poop, worms, and urine. But most of all cuteness. She slept on the whole magic carpet ride home back to the land of the Hall of Fame. Then we took her over to Prince Tom and Princess Leah's castle so the children to greet her and make merriment. She took her very first dump on the carpet. It was a really great first impression. Mocha has not been back to visit since.
 |
| It's hard to believe she was that tiny the day we got her! |
 |
| It's dead. I'm sure of it. |
Since that day, Mocha has enjoyed many adventures to far off lands like Ohio and Hemby Bridge and Indian Trail... and that's about it. She's experienced new and exciting things like peanut butter and ice cream and the joys of ripping stuffed animals to tiny, tiny bits. And remote controls. We've experienced the terror that is inflicted by vicious, vicious mockingbirds as unsuspecting victims. Together, we've pulled very long blue strings out of her "hind end" in our front yard (clearly it must've been connected to an intestine; it was quite the ordeal), using a stick and a leaf, as the neighbor children were walking up the street just as school was letting out. If that moment wasn't made of pure magic, I don't know what was. Nothing like meeting your new neighbors in THE MOST AWKWARD WAY POSSIBLE. "Hey, you don't know me, and I don't know you, but how about you hold this stick in place so I can grasp the string with a handful of leaves?"
 |
| Snow in Charlotte!!! |
We've frolicked in the freshly fallen snow, slid through wet morning dew together (in front of neighbors and in full public view), tangled and tripped until I've bled, had the circulation to my right hand and wrist cut off on numerous occasions, cleaned up large piles of vomit, vacuumed numbers piles of bone shards, and endured some extremely gassy evenings. Sometimes she even frightens herself with her "gassy" tendencies. The best is when it's so loud that she actually jumps up and barks at herself because she doesn't realize the sound came from HER. Classic.
 |
| So pitiful. |
But, it hasn't been all fun and games (yep, those were the fun parts). My poor, poor baby had cancer removed about 6 months ago. Luckily they were able to remove everything from two spots on her hind legs, but we still have to keep a close watch on her... unfortunately Boxers are prone to mast cell disease.
Some of Mocha's favorite things, which don't include raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens:
1) Purina Busy Bones - she is OBSESSED
 |
| It was fun while it lasted. |
2) EOS lip balm eggs - I cannot explain her fascination. I'm down four for the count presently just because I absentmindedly left the egg on the end table while I ran to the potty. Go me. Literally, I could leave a bag of Dove chocolate on the floor right next to an EOS egg. I could leave the room for 5 minutes. The chocolate would remain intact, in the bag. The lip balm would be gone, gone, gone.
3) Vanilla ice cream. I know, I know. We're bad, bad pet parents.
4) Her toy squeaky eggs... these things have lasted for about 3 years. I can't believe it They're about on their last leg and I'm praying to Jesus that they'll have them again at the Southern Christmas Show this year. They also bring great joy to us as adults. I mean, we really know how to party... there are a total of 5 eggs. Two years ago on New Year's Eve Todd, I, my parents, sister, and our friend Andy had all 5 eggs tossed in the air at one time for like an hour straight. We can really live it up, I tell ya.
5) Starburst jelly beans - seriously, frothy drool and bubbles for at the mere sight of the bag.
 |
| Senior Picture. |
6) Seat-stealing. It's her favorite activity. You get up to get a bottle of water and BAM. Seat taken. You're dismissed to the floor.
7) Balls. I'm not being dirty here, people, she loves TOY balls... you know, the plastic cheap ones from Walmart. Unfortunately, they last about 33 seconds until she pops them.
So, that's Mocha in a nutshell. She's so weird.
~ Heather
No comments:
Post a Comment